It was never meant to be a joke, but I fear that is how some have taken it. That is, the statement that one can have our guns when they pry them from our cold dead hands. Yes, I typed LOL 🙂 like a 12 year old girl, but perhaps this message will seep in to the young moldable minds of our youth before they are decieved on how the relative security in which they are raised is maintained. You see, the popularity of that phrase has allowed it to be used in all sorts of contexts, many humorous. I am a funny guy, so I can roll with this to an extent. If you reach for the last hot wing, I might say you can have it when you pry it from my cold buffalo covered dead hands. We all laugh and have a good time while I hopefully still in fact have that last hot wing. However, when we start talking guns and the 2nd amendment my demeanor shifts a bit. A laughing Jim Carey no more, but a grizzled Clint Eastwood I become. Why? Because Cold Dead Hands was never meant to be a joke.
I am actually a pretty politically moderate guy with some obvious Conservative leanings. However, I don’t consider myself a gun enthusiast despite being a Veteran Marine Grunt. I like guns, but I don’t have the money or the time to live at the range and shoot all day. I am indeed a gun owner, but I don’t own an extensive arsenal. Consequently, my house will not be the place to come in the event of the zombie apocalypse. However, I assure you, my house is also not the place to come in the middle of the night if you want to steal my bacon. It will end poorly for you Mr. bacon thief.
Now, I also am a firm believer in the role guns play in checking and limiting government while at the same time not a proponent of actually overthrowing the government. If the police knocked on my door today with a legal warrant or order to take my gun, rather than shoot a cop just doing his job that day, I would give it to them and fight them in court. At this point in our society, I am confident the constitution has my back and my gun would return to me legally. You might see that as capitulation, but I see it as accurately assessing the threat. Plus I’ll just hide my other guns. However, if I looked out that same door to see every door on my street getting kicked in, then cold dead hands becomes a reality.
Thus, as you read this article, I just don’t want you to think I am without reason, restraint, or reality. There is a time and place for everything under the sun. A time to live, a time to fight, and yes, a time to die. We must all weigh our current circumstances and decide which season in which we currently reside.
Cold. Dead. Hands.
Honestly, I don’t worry too much about mass gun confiscation in America. Look, if you are a federal official tasked with confiscating all the legal guns in America, then you are pretty much like the guy put on the first row of Civil War battle formations. Go ahead and grab your bloody face, scream and fall down because you are toast brother. Cold Dead Hands is not a joke and with fitting Irony, those that are the most serious about it are more likely to still have their hands very warm and very alive after you try and take it from them. Your hands, well, you might want to put on some mittens.
I am not trying to promote violence of any sort. Most gun owners are patriotic law abiding citizens. They are just not kidding about their constitutional rights. Why would they? American progressives routinely celebrate heroes whom risk all in the name of free speech, free press, and the right to assemble and protest. But let us not forget that those more popular rights were only available to us because they knew how to jump in bed with the mighty 2nd and secure their liberty. But nooo, when the 2nd Amendment shows up to their freedom party, they act appauled by its violent nature as they turn their noses up and deny that the 2nd made it all the way to 3rd base with free speech. Ladies and gentlemen, guns are intertwined into the fabric of all our freedoms. If they had cell phone cameras back then, there would probablly even be some naughty pictures to prove it. Cold, Dead, Hands. It’s not a joke.
Sit Down. Have a Drink
Come now America, let us reason together. I understand that much tragedy in America takes place at then end of a gun. Whether it is domestic violence, mass shootings, or random sensless crime, I know that it is painful to any involved. However, you would find no greater allies to solving such problems than law abiding gun owners themselves. You see, you can’t ensure every bad person is without a gun any more than you can ensure they are without a joint. But when evil violence comes looking for you, your best bet might be to go get behind the man or woman with an NRA sticker on their truck. The simple fact is, I know evil exists in America. However, when my family walks around in public every day, I am hoping that more good is walking around them and I don’t want the good to be disarmed.
It was never assumed that Americans would have to outsource every element of personal defense to the State. Our government is here to help provide for the common defense, not the entirety of individual defense. The right to stick up for oneself is as American as George Washington’s wooden teeth that he probablly made from chopping down his father’s cherry tree and then lying about it so he could make some teeth. When are certain elements of our society going to quit pretending that the right to bear arms is a lesser right? It is number 2 on the list people! It is literally like the second thing the founding fathers thought to add on that list. Can’t we go ahead and acknowledge it is kind of like a big deal? Cold, Dead Hands People. It is not, nor will it ever be a joke. After all, synonymous with liberty itself, the 2nd is where the rest of our rights go when they are getting ancy for a little freedom.
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