momsnight-out1

Ok, first things first, stay at home moms who may have just read that headline, lets do some safety checks. If you need to sit down right now, please do so.  If you were holding your baby in one hand and looking at this on your phone with the other, be sure you are still holding your baby and did not drop or projectile the baby anywhere.  If you were driving when you read that, well then shame you for reading a blog while driving although I seriously appreciate the support, but in either case let’s all breath for a second. For there are two versions of lacking any monetary value and that would be worthless and priceless.  I’ll let you read on to see which one I mean.  However, the picture is from the movie Mom’s Night Out that seems to be sweeping the mommy world.  I haven’t seen it and probably won’t, but that doesn’t mean its not a good movie.

Money, Money, Money

Speaking of value, Money is a funny thing. At 35 years old, I make more money now than I did when I was 21 years old.  However, I honestly can’t say that I have any more money left over now than I did when I made substantially less. I have never claimed to be financially smart, again, you see my article 3 Steps to Financial Mediocrity for that.  However, I have learned a thing or two as I get wiser with age.  But what I have realized is that most people are either making more money to spend more money or they are making more money so they can spend that money in their retirement.  However, at one point or another, everybody spends the money.

The first aim of the money we make as a family would be to feed our children and provide a roof over their heads.  As it turns out, my children have grown accustomed to eating every day and not just some. The house we live in is nothing fancy, but it provides ample room for my soon to be family of 5. When you zoom out to a global scale, you realize that to much of the world, accomplishing these two tasks of feeding your kids every day and providing shelter is their equivalent to Charlie Sheen’s “Winning”.  However, feeding your kids and providing shelter in America truthfully doesn’t require that much income.  It is usually just the standard at which you want to do that and all the other stuff that starts to drain the American budget.

Cost Benefit Analysis

So when it comes to my salary, I work as a non-profit manager and feel truthfully blessed to have that job and the income associated with it.  However, its not as if I am managing a hedge fund or anything.  Its a non-profit.  However, I am off my salary able to feed, house, and clothe my family while at the same time participating in a variety of fun luxuries that America has to offer.  We do have some debt obligations but are working diligently to pay those off.

So here is where we get to the stay at home mom business.  If my wife worked, we would indeed bring home more money.  However, I would like to pose the question, More money for what?  If you want to have a little fun, you can imagine DJ Snake and Lil John’s song, if you can call it a song that is, Turn down for what, and rearrange the words to sing, More Money for What?  Its amazing what we will sacrifice today in order have money for a future day that we are never promised.

Its not that I wouldn’t mind more money.  My daughter has been saving money in a piggy bank for Disney World because she very much wants to go, but we very much don’t have the money for a trip to the magical kingdom.  Would be great to pay off debt quicker, start actually saving for retirement, or be able to eat Ribeyes every day for dinner.  Because I would.  Literally, I would eat steak every day for dinner if I could.  However, to make this money, my wife would have to cease her role as stay at home mom.  So lets examine the life of my stay at home wife.

The Mommy Warrior Queen

First let me say, that this post is in no way meant to slight working moms.  Every family must do what is best for them and you know your family and yourself better than I.  There are single moms out there working to provide for their family in a way that is remarkable and they deserve so much credit for what they do.  Rather, this is a personal blog, so this is a blog about my experience and what I can testify to, that’s all.  My wife worked when we had our first child as she was a teacher then and it just made sense.  So if your a working mom, that’s cool too.

However, now that my wife stays at home, I have to be honest, I absolutely love it and adore her all the more for it.  I go to work everyday knowing that my wife and I will be the chief influences over our kids.  My wife is actually taking on the task of homeschooling as well.  Something I never thought I would do with my kids.  However, she still goes to a school 2 days a week, but my wife is teacher in chief!  On Friday, my 5 year old read her first book to me and it was amazing.  My wife taught her that.  Amazing.  Not even getting into how she cooks awesome meals, cleans, and deals with fussy kids on top of all that. But you would have to pay me Bill Gates type money to do what she does everyday.

I know this parenting of kids gig is a limited time affair.  Our children will grow up and become adults.  So why not embrace every second of it.  If that means I don’t get to eat steak every day  in my retirement, then so be it.  My dentures will probably have trouble chewing the steak anyway. It brings me infinite joy to know that every day, my kids are enjoying the max time they could spend with their mother who is so good to them. My wife runs this household like the warrior queen she is and I know that because some times I encroach on the territory of the warrior queen and I am reminded of her fierceness!

The Result

So what is the result of the cost benefit analysis of my stay at home wife?  Its this.  Priceless.  Not a single penny, not a million dollars.  I wouldn’t trade what she offers our kids and our household for any amount of money, because honestly, more money for what? My wife desires to do this and my kids enjoy it, so as a father and husband, I have immense joy in providing that for them.  We trust in God as our ultimate provider and look forward to seeing our children grow and flourish.

Again, this is not a criticism whatsoever of working mom’s as I think you are awesome too. You may very well be changing the world with your career.   Its just a testimony of my awesome wife and our circumstances.  My wife would start to question why I could testify about so many other mothers, so I just can’t speak to your circumstances.  I just know when I stay at home for day, I can’t handle it.  Can’t do what my wife does, so I am so blessed that she can do so.

So stay at home moms out there, if any you are doubting your value, just know that I have run the numbers, checked the figures, and the outcome is a definitive and unquestioned priceless from this Dad.